10 things you’re Retirement Representative / Financial Professional isn’t telling you.
(Don't sue the messenger. Below blog is my personal opinion and is in no way to be construed as financial advice or in any way affiliated with GWRS, its affiliates, parent companie, past, present and future. This is my rant people. Do not take it to the bank)
1) There is no magic formula. Buy low sell high? It’s a crap shoot. You shouldn’t be selling mutual funds on a daily basis anyway. Trying to time the market is a loser’s game. You won’t win. Have a stiff drink and go to bed early.
2) You will work until you die. Better enjoy your life. It isn’t going to get better in your retirement. (Diaper years, anyone?). Have a stiff drink. Now have another one.
3) We are in the same boat you are. We the esteemed investment professionals have made crappy personal business decisions just like you. In over our heads on credit cards? Yep. Strapped for cash due to lack of overtime, bonuses etc. Yessiree Bob… Unemployed / Underemployed? Hell yeah. Upside-down on our ill-advised mortgages? You betcha. I’m going to have a stiff drink now.
4) On the flip side: 95% of things you will stress about never happen. Think about it. Does it really pay to keep stressing? Hey that drink worked.
5) There is life after foreclosure, eviction, repossession. Yeah I know. The credit card companies, debt collectors, CNN and all of the senators across both parties would have you believe otherwise. Give’em a drink already. They can’t talk out of both sides of their mouths while quaffing a drink.
6) Turn off CNN, CNBC, MSNBC etc. You will save yourselves some heartache. Here’s to Freedom of the Press. Now I am exercising my right to not listen to them and have a stiff drink instead.
7) The economists don’t have a clue about when the market will rebound. Turn them off too. They have been drinking and they don’t know what they are talking about.
8) Is it really a likely scenario that the financial community, government, world is facing Armageddon? Really? Do you really need to stockpile dry and canned goods in your garage and move all of your assets to a money market account that gets less than half a percent in interest and won’t keep up with inflation? That’s the best coping strategy you got? Do yourselves a favor, have a stiff drink and go to bed early or at the very least, stockpile some good quality liquor for that good stiff drink.
9) God love all of the investing public, but the majority (and I mean the majority here) act like a herd of doomed cows stampeding their way off the proverbial cliff and bitching all the way as they plunge to their certain deaths. Take a stand. Resist the urge to moo. Have a black and white cocktail instead.
10) You are responsible for your own financial and life decisions. Education is the key. Don’t assume someone else knows better because they say they do. Educate and empower yourselves. No excuses. Make sure you hydrate when having that stiff drink.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Saturday, December 6, 2008
The Unevolved Chromosome
THE UNEVOLVED CHROMOSOME:
I have a theory. It is decidedly unscientifically tested. But if were to be proven; the ramifications would be truly world-shifting. Ready? Wait for it….
Ok The chromosome pair that defines a woman as a woman is the XX chromosome. The male chromosome is XY. Now if you look at the Y chromosome, its clearly missing a leg i.e. the chromosome, hence it is not as evolved if you will. This begs the question: what is on the missing fourth leg of the Y chromosome that is included in the female X chromosome? Allow me to enumerate.
A) The ability to follow up on plans without excessive prodding.
B) The ability to listen compassionately without having to fix an issue:. Just because I am talking, does not mean you can do anything or for that matter, that I want you to do anything.
C) The ability to ask for directions. Nuff said
D) The desire for true emotional connection with their mates, friends, etc.
E) The ability to have true emotional connection with their mates, friends etc.
F) The ability to think with their cerebellums instead of their vaginas.
G) The ability to distinguish shades of gray, cream, white etc.: i.e. eggshell white is different from ivory.
H) The ability to differentiate between shoes: oxfords, pumps, platforms and peep-toes.
I) The knowledge to train ahem their monkeys, I’m sorry, their mates.
J) The ability to take care of sick children, do dishes, laundry, dinner etc. without whining.
K) The knowledge that doing stuff like changing a car’s oil is dirty, and uncomfortable. Isn’t there a trained monkey around?
L) On the flip side, of the above advantages: there are definite disadvantages i.e. the propensity to obsess to a degree indescribable with mere words. Why hasn’t he called? Did I have bad breath?
M) That whole time of the month thing. Seriously. The urge to rip someone’s face off from the neck up, is never more prevalent than during the time of the month.
N) Periods. Let me count the ways they suck. They are dirty. They cause bloating. They cause cramps. They make us the aforementioned cranky, pissy, etc.
O) Our propensity for asking trick questions: “Do I look fat in this?” and “She’s cute, isn’t she?” Trust me. Men cannot win.
P) The ability to hold a grudge until the end of time: “you remember when you forgot to take the trash out in 1986? Well that really hurt my feelings!” ummm..yeah…
Q) Inability to program VCR’s, remote controls, cell phones to ring the Star Wars theme whenever someone whose names begin with an N rings. I never knew how important that was.
I am sure there are more advantages and disadvantages that are not listed here. The point of the blog is to illustrate that the differences between males and femles are definitely housed in that missing fourth leg. I truly believe that God (Jehovah, Allah , whatever.) tried to even the score by making the choice of male vs female chromosomes the purview of the contributing male chromosome. Else the scales are definitely tipped in woman’s favor. That’s just how I see it..
I have a theory. It is decidedly unscientifically tested. But if were to be proven; the ramifications would be truly world-shifting. Ready? Wait for it….
Ok The chromosome pair that defines a woman as a woman is the XX chromosome. The male chromosome is XY. Now if you look at the Y chromosome, its clearly missing a leg i.e. the chromosome, hence it is not as evolved if you will. This begs the question: what is on the missing fourth leg of the Y chromosome that is included in the female X chromosome? Allow me to enumerate.
A) The ability to follow up on plans without excessive prodding.
B) The ability to listen compassionately without having to fix an issue:. Just because I am talking, does not mean you can do anything or for that matter, that I want you to do anything.
C) The ability to ask for directions. Nuff said
D) The desire for true emotional connection with their mates, friends, etc.
E) The ability to have true emotional connection with their mates, friends etc.
F) The ability to think with their cerebellums instead of their vaginas.
G) The ability to distinguish shades of gray, cream, white etc.: i.e. eggshell white is different from ivory.
H) The ability to differentiate between shoes: oxfords, pumps, platforms and peep-toes.
I) The knowledge to train ahem their monkeys, I’m sorry, their mates.
J) The ability to take care of sick children, do dishes, laundry, dinner etc. without whining.
K) The knowledge that doing stuff like changing a car’s oil is dirty, and uncomfortable. Isn’t there a trained monkey around?
L) On the flip side, of the above advantages: there are definite disadvantages i.e. the propensity to obsess to a degree indescribable with mere words. Why hasn’t he called? Did I have bad breath?
M) That whole time of the month thing. Seriously. The urge to rip someone’s face off from the neck up, is never more prevalent than during the time of the month.
N) Periods. Let me count the ways they suck. They are dirty. They cause bloating. They cause cramps. They make us the aforementioned cranky, pissy, etc.
O) Our propensity for asking trick questions: “Do I look fat in this?” and “She’s cute, isn’t she?” Trust me. Men cannot win.
P) The ability to hold a grudge until the end of time: “you remember when you forgot to take the trash out in 1986? Well that really hurt my feelings!” ummm..yeah…
Q) Inability to program VCR’s, remote controls, cell phones to ring the Star Wars theme whenever someone whose names begin with an N rings. I never knew how important that was.
I am sure there are more advantages and disadvantages that are not listed here. The point of the blog is to illustrate that the differences between males and femles are definitely housed in that missing fourth leg. I truly believe that God (Jehovah, Allah , whatever.) tried to even the score by making the choice of male vs female chromosomes the purview of the contributing male chromosome. Else the scales are definitely tipped in woman’s favor. That’s just how I see it..
Rejection
Rejection: Nasty word. Loneliness: another nasty word. Both of these words are descriptive of recent dumb actions on my part. A little confession: I dated someone recently who we shall call F. After spending the evening together, making plans for the following Friday, and getting that “Love to Love ya Babaaayyyy “ feeling, to my surprise,I get a text (again with the dang texting!) that his girlfriend (notice I did not say ex-girlfriend) has left her husband and shown up at his door at 1:00 am bags in hand. Furthermore, he feels he “really needs to see where this goes.” Oh you know I have to dissect this one!
To be honest, I knew he had issues with his girlfriend. I was under the impression he was ready to end it. I knew that there was a chance that the girlfriend would rear her ugly head (really I have no idea if it is ugly or not). But this was a chance I took. Sigh.
I hear Jerry Springer on my other line. Now stepping away from own stupidity which I do indeed, own. Let’s contemplate for a moment the dynamics just ripe for my analysis.
G/ F leaves her husband for a dude that she has known two months. Apparently, this is a recurring pattern for her. That is she has a history of cheating on her husband with a variety of partners both male and female. Yeah, she’s that kind of chick, people.
She leaves her husband, a man with whom she has a legal binding marriage subject to all the acrimonious property division that entails, a man with whom she shares a common history, (however painful, dishonest or crappy it may have been), for a dude that she has known for two months. Oh did I mention she also has a girlfriend who is “the other man.” You are forgiven if you are confused at this point. I know I am: He’s dating her, who is married to him( sub 1) who is not aware of other him (Sub 2) or her (Sub 3) for that matter “and the colored girls sing doo-de-doo, de doo, doo de doooooo…”
Now I hate to be knocking on a fellow woman. However this scenario is absolutely rife with commenting possibilities. Mea Culpa. Mea Culpa.
First of all, you know the adage: don’t be going after someone who is willing to cheat on their significant other for you? Well let’s call that a law. Shall we? Let’s go through my reasoning. A person marries another person. Theoretically, it’s for life. A person grows how shall we say: disenfranchised with their spouse and starts looking for some nookie- nookie on the side. Said disenfranchised individual finds the nookie-nookie action with an individual. Said individual, may or may not be extremely naïve in thinking that the afore-mentioned disenfranchised person will a) leave their current spouse for him /her and b) that they would not do the exact same thing him / her. C) Do you really want to be with someone who has the morals of an alley cat? Seriously people: It’s time to call a spade a spade. We as a society of gotten way too loosey goosey with our expectations for things like, oh I don’t know: fidelity, morality. Yes. I am saying it FIDELITY. Say it with me now. FIDELITY.
I am sick and tired of this attitude of “oh I am a victim, I can get away with doing anything I want because, I have had crap happen to me in my childhood.” To this I say: BULLSHIT. Buck up people!!! Own your own stuff!!! No one is responsible for your stupid decisions, except you. Furthermore, society, whether individually or as a group will no longer facilitate that attitude. I am calling it. That’s it we, as a society, are DONE. We have all had shit happen to us. Guess what. There are people out there that are surviving and thriving without falling back on that tired old rag of an excuse. I may be dating myself here, but I grew up with the understanding that if you get married, even if you don’t like that person much five years later, you stay married. Marriage is for life. Period. End of Story. Divorce happens. Sort of like shit happens. But guess what? You don’t go into a marriage thinking, oh if it doesn’t work out, (i.e. if my spouse gets tired of pandering to my victim mentality, or I get tired of his / her victim mentality), we can always get a Divorce. No, people, you can’t . There are way too many kids who are products of broken homes. Yes I did use the words broken homes. It’s time we as a society started thinking about what sort of example we are setting for our children. Do we really want our children to grow up in a world with no sense of personal responsibility, with no sense of security or sense of consequence? It’s time that we as a society started growing up and owning our own crap. That’s just how see it.
To be honest, I knew he had issues with his girlfriend. I was under the impression he was ready to end it. I knew that there was a chance that the girlfriend would rear her ugly head (really I have no idea if it is ugly or not). But this was a chance I took. Sigh.
I hear Jerry Springer on my other line. Now stepping away from own stupidity which I do indeed, own. Let’s contemplate for a moment the dynamics just ripe for my analysis.
G/ F leaves her husband for a dude that she has known two months. Apparently, this is a recurring pattern for her. That is she has a history of cheating on her husband with a variety of partners both male and female. Yeah, she’s that kind of chick, people.
She leaves her husband, a man with whom she has a legal binding marriage subject to all the acrimonious property division that entails, a man with whom she shares a common history, (however painful, dishonest or crappy it may have been), for a dude that she has known for two months. Oh did I mention she also has a girlfriend who is “the other man.” You are forgiven if you are confused at this point. I know I am: He’s dating her, who is married to him( sub 1) who is not aware of other him (Sub 2) or her (Sub 3) for that matter “and the colored girls sing doo-de-doo, de doo, doo de doooooo…”
Now I hate to be knocking on a fellow woman. However this scenario is absolutely rife with commenting possibilities. Mea Culpa. Mea Culpa.
First of all, you know the adage: don’t be going after someone who is willing to cheat on their significant other for you? Well let’s call that a law. Shall we? Let’s go through my reasoning. A person marries another person. Theoretically, it’s for life. A person grows how shall we say: disenfranchised with their spouse and starts looking for some nookie- nookie on the side. Said disenfranchised individual finds the nookie-nookie action with an individual. Said individual, may or may not be extremely naïve in thinking that the afore-mentioned disenfranchised person will a) leave their current spouse for him /her and b) that they would not do the exact same thing him / her. C) Do you really want to be with someone who has the morals of an alley cat? Seriously people: It’s time to call a spade a spade. We as a society of gotten way too loosey goosey with our expectations for things like, oh I don’t know: fidelity, morality. Yes. I am saying it FIDELITY. Say it with me now. FIDELITY.
I am sick and tired of this attitude of “oh I am a victim, I can get away with doing anything I want because, I have had crap happen to me in my childhood.” To this I say: BULLSHIT. Buck up people!!! Own your own stuff!!! No one is responsible for your stupid decisions, except you. Furthermore, society, whether individually or as a group will no longer facilitate that attitude. I am calling it. That’s it we, as a society, are DONE. We have all had shit happen to us. Guess what. There are people out there that are surviving and thriving without falling back on that tired old rag of an excuse. I may be dating myself here, but I grew up with the understanding that if you get married, even if you don’t like that person much five years later, you stay married. Marriage is for life. Period. End of Story. Divorce happens. Sort of like shit happens. But guess what? You don’t go into a marriage thinking, oh if it doesn’t work out, (i.e. if my spouse gets tired of pandering to my victim mentality, or I get tired of his / her victim mentality), we can always get a Divorce. No, people, you can’t . There are way too many kids who are products of broken homes. Yes I did use the words broken homes. It’s time we as a society started thinking about what sort of example we are setting for our children. Do we really want our children to grow up in a world with no sense of personal responsibility, with no sense of security or sense of consequence? It’s time that we as a society started growing up and owning our own crap. That’s just how see it.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
BTWITIAILW/U or Internet Dating, Socializing vs. Old School Courtship.
I am a recent inductee into the world of Internet dating. I spent a large part of my twenties and thirties in self-imposed dating isolation, for several reasons, not the least which was some pseudo-Catholic guilt and the pursuit of multiple college degrees. Little did I know but the dating world was undergoing an accelerating revolution that directly correlates with the creation, implementation and mass adoption of computer technology. In short, one might say I am lamenting the fall of manners, etiquette and old-fashioned courtship.
Back in the olden days, before the advent of Blackberries, text messaging and cell phones, PDA’s meant Public Displays of Affection. The above-mentioned blackberries were something that grew wild in the woods behind our houses and we munched on frequently when we walked home from school. You remember those days? Boys told you they liked you by pulling your hair and then writing you a geometrically correct written note. Granted back in the ole days, one had a certain amount of delay in gratification: i.e. one had to wait until after school to get the obligatory breathless phone call. God help the parents who did not have call-waiting. Now a boy / guy / man can text you in seconds: “RU THERE? IMO UR HOT! LYKYAMY!” From hastily written notes slipped between colorful paper book covered text books: “I heard from Jane, who heard from Amber that Johnny likes you!” to communication at light speed. Not since the days of Elizabeth I and courtly love, complete with flowers , poetry, song and dance has a generation of men been more loquacious in their desire for female companionship, albeit, in code.
So what does this mean for me, you may be asking? Well, for one thing, I am completely lost, up the proverbial creek without a paddle. Seriously, I have to consult books to point me in the right direction and translate 21st century moves for a brain stuck in 1989. What are the rules for the first date, again? What are we not supposed to talk about again? THERE ARE RULES ABOUT WHAT TO EAT?!?!?!? (Although, in all honesty the eating rules have always been around, but now new meanings new variations exist). Who knew that we as a dating culture, we would move from women being expected to eat lettuce leaves and lemons, are now expected to eat steak (but not too much steak).
Seriously, this new code, this new language, this new map of etiquette, expectations, excursions and exclamations sometimes feels like a foreign language. Is it no wonder there are books available bookstores “He’s Just Not That into You” and “Internet Dating for Dummies”? When you think about it the first date, in any epoch has always been akin to a final exam. Who among us has not developed a standard list of questions and answers to the standard first date repartee? (My married friends are all cringing right now thinking to themselves: There for the grace of God, go I, thank God, I don’t have to do that crap any more…”) Now, however, the final exam has changed formats from “Fill in the bubbles with your #2 pencil” To:
“Check the box that corresponds with the correct answer with your cursor. You will not be able to go back once you click enter. Server Error 505 has occurred. You have now completed and failed the exam. Please see proctor for window to reschedule exam. You will receive email confirmation that you HAVE FAILED.” Am I to blame for wanting to hide under the covers with a cat or two as I contemplate my lack of Internet connection?
Don’t get me wrong, I desire to have a significant relationship. Of course, in my heart of hearts, I want the white picket fence and the 2.5 children. Let’s not lie to ourselves: we have all been spoon-fed the American Dream. There are days when the smell of an adorable little rugrat child is positively addicting. So I pursue on. I will continue to pursue the goal (amended of course to fit reality: i.e Do I really want to get married, in the face of increased divorce rates, escalating child-rearing costs and college tuition?) Can’t I just spoil my niece instead, and keep Him (my as yet undiscovered significant other) on speed dial? Regardless of my particular interpretation of the American Dream (which is evolving as we speak), pardon me while I surreptitiously consult my Text Messaging Lingo to English Pocket Dictionary,
Oh and by the way: http://www.netlingo.com/emailsh.cfm
Have a great day!
Back in the olden days, before the advent of Blackberries, text messaging and cell phones, PDA’s meant Public Displays of Affection. The above-mentioned blackberries were something that grew wild in the woods behind our houses and we munched on frequently when we walked home from school. You remember those days? Boys told you they liked you by pulling your hair and then writing you a geometrically correct written note. Granted back in the ole days, one had a certain amount of delay in gratification: i.e. one had to wait until after school to get the obligatory breathless phone call. God help the parents who did not have call-waiting. Now a boy / guy / man can text you in seconds: “RU THERE? IMO UR HOT! LYKYAMY!” From hastily written notes slipped between colorful paper book covered text books: “I heard from Jane, who heard from Amber that Johnny likes you!” to communication at light speed. Not since the days of Elizabeth I and courtly love, complete with flowers , poetry, song and dance has a generation of men been more loquacious in their desire for female companionship, albeit, in code.
So what does this mean for me, you may be asking? Well, for one thing, I am completely lost, up the proverbial creek without a paddle. Seriously, I have to consult books to point me in the right direction and translate 21st century moves for a brain stuck in 1989. What are the rules for the first date, again? What are we not supposed to talk about again? THERE ARE RULES ABOUT WHAT TO EAT?!?!?!? (Although, in all honesty the eating rules have always been around, but now new meanings new variations exist). Who knew that we as a dating culture, we would move from women being expected to eat lettuce leaves and lemons, are now expected to eat steak (but not too much steak).
Seriously, this new code, this new language, this new map of etiquette, expectations, excursions and exclamations sometimes feels like a foreign language. Is it no wonder there are books available bookstores “He’s Just Not That into You” and “Internet Dating for Dummies”? When you think about it the first date, in any epoch has always been akin to a final exam. Who among us has not developed a standard list of questions and answers to the standard first date repartee? (My married friends are all cringing right now thinking to themselves: There for the grace of God, go I, thank God, I don’t have to do that crap any more…”) Now, however, the final exam has changed formats from “Fill in the bubbles with your #2 pencil” To:
“Check the box that corresponds with the correct answer with your cursor. You will not be able to go back once you click enter. Server Error 505 has occurred. You have now completed and failed the exam. Please see proctor for window to reschedule exam. You will receive email confirmation that you HAVE FAILED.” Am I to blame for wanting to hide under the covers with a cat or two as I contemplate my lack of Internet connection?
Don’t get me wrong, I desire to have a significant relationship. Of course, in my heart of hearts, I want the white picket fence and the 2.5 children. Let’s not lie to ourselves: we have all been spoon-fed the American Dream. There are days when the smell of an adorable little rugrat child is positively addicting. So I pursue on. I will continue to pursue the goal (amended of course to fit reality: i.e Do I really want to get married, in the face of increased divorce rates, escalating child-rearing costs and college tuition?) Can’t I just spoil my niece instead, and keep Him (my as yet undiscovered significant other) on speed dial? Regardless of my particular interpretation of the American Dream (which is evolving as we speak), pardon me while I surreptitiously consult my Text Messaging Lingo to English Pocket Dictionary,
Oh and by the way: http://www.netlingo.com/emailsh.cfm
Have a great day!
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
How to Become a Nun
How to Become a Nun
By eHow Health Editor
Rate: (7 Ratings)
The decision to become a nun is a life changing commitment. Therefore, the process you must undergo in order to fill the position is quite lengthy and intense and generally requires giving up all romantic relationships and material goods.
Instructions
Difficulty: Moderate
Step1Evaluate your current lifestyle to see if you are eligible to become a nun. In order to become a nun, a woman must be an unmarried virgin. If you are divorced, it is required that your marriage have been annulled by the Catholic Church, meaning the church has officially recognized it as null and void.
By eHow Health Editor
Rate: (7 Ratings)
The decision to become a nun is a life changing commitment. Therefore, the process you must undergo in order to fill the position is quite lengthy and intense and generally requires giving up all romantic relationships and material goods.
Instructions
Difficulty: Moderate
Step1Evaluate your current lifestyle to see if you are eligible to become a nun. In order to become a nun, a woman must be an unmarried virgin. If you are divorced, it is required that your marriage have been annulled by the Catholic Church, meaning the church has officially recognized it as null and void.
Ok, unmarried, check. Virgin: ummm, troublesome. I wonder if the Catholic churce can annull one's sexual history. i.e. Restore one's, cough, cough, hymen. Just a thought. Something to look into.
Step2Graduate from college. Most religious orders require a college education, at minimum in the form of a bachelor's degree. This is particularly true for orders that offer education services within their communities to children or the general public. It may be necessary to have concentrated your studies on religion.
Degrees: check, check, and check.
Step3Choose a religious order that best aligns with your own personal mission to serve God. There are a variety of different groups of nuns with different missions. Some prefer to practice their religious beliefs in a private, contemplative manner while others choose to be active in the community, spreading their beliefs as activists. Traditionally, nuns spend the majority of their time inside the convent and those who are more active are instead referred to as sisters.
Apparently, I could not based on my personality be a nun per se, as they spend most of their time in silence, contemplating. As we all know, I would go promptly crazy with that. So I resign myself to being a Sister, allowing me to continue ahem commenting.
Step4Decide the area of work you would like to devote your time to by exploring the work done by different orders. Nuns perform a variety of jobs, including teaching and counseling, library studies, nursing, winemaking and political activism. While most nuns work directly within the community in which their convent is located, others choose to travel throughout the world to countries in need of aid.
Hey they have nuns that make wine! Sign me up! I can be the wine taster! mea culpa mea culpa!
Step5Live in a convent on a trial basis to decide if the religious life is for you. This is a process encouraged by most religious orders, since it is a period of serious contemplation about becoming a nun. Women in this situation, referred to as novices, are often allowed to continue their current jobs in the outside world while living in the convent. Generally, it is perfectly understandable and acceptable to choose not to become a nun after this period, so feel free to use this as a real learning experience without fear of making a commitment before you are completely sure.
I wonder if they have short-term leases, allow pets and have 24 hour maintenance? I wonder how much rent is, is it cheaper than my current apartment? What are the amenities of your typical convent, anyway? Again something to think about.
Step6Make vows of poverty and chastity after you officially decide to become a nun. Be aware that these vows are considered permanent and this decision is intended to be a lifelong commitment.
Vows of poverty: not a big stretch. I can groove with that. One less package of ramen noodle soup should make me suitably povertylishess. Chastity: also not a big tretch.....Nadie...Nunca...Nada!!!
Men: Amena's take
am going to wax poetic. So I have been contacted by a couple of guys from the online website. One of the b@stards admits, he was online because his fiance was not giving him enough attention. At least he was honest about it. But that brings up the question of how many of these bozos are doing the same thing. Seriously, have we as a society lost all friggin' comprehension of things like fidelity? I listened to this talk show this a.m. and these radio dj's were talking about an article that came out that said that women were more likely to forgive an affair than men were. Ok. Let's dissect that, shall we?
a) I happen to know someone who forgave her husband of an affair. Is she happy in her marriage? From an outsider's perspective, sure. But from a friend's perspective, when she calls me crying because her dumb@ss husband can't think with his big head, I have to wonder. She says she was always waiting for the shoe to drop. Even though he is her best friend, she, in the back of her mind, was waiting to be disappointed. Now, not getting into therapeutic issues that arise here, this really brings home the point: she may not have expected him to cheat, but she was certainly not surprised.
b) My second point: I think women are more likely to forgive an affair because and I know this is harsh, but let's call a spade a spade: we don't have high expections for our significant others. I.e. in general, we perceive them (men) to be stupid. Now don't get your panties all you married ladies in a twist. But think about it. Do you really, really think that your husbands, significant others etc. are really as smart as you emotionally? I know. I know. Big ole manhater comment. But heck, seriously, I think our society has gone way too far in accepting emotional mediocrity, behavioral mediocrity and mediorcrity in general. Nobody owns their own issues. It's always somebody else's fault. OOOOHHHHH this yanks my chain.
c) Of course, Married men may be the exception to the above-mentioned rule. But here is my take on that: married men are trained like monkeys. Like Pavlov's dog, married men have been trained to perform in a manner in accordance with their perceived reward: i.e. food, sex, power tools etc. The minute a wife get lax with training, the monkey reverts back to behavior only exhibited in the wild, i.e. sniffing randomn female butts.
Ok, now that was a manhater comment.
d) This is not to say they don't have their uses: changing the oil in the car, getting the cereal box from the top shelf, grunting at intruders. The obligatory procreation cycle. Just don't give them too much to think about. Seriously, I am not mad at all... Jack@sses.
Have a great day.
a) I happen to know someone who forgave her husband of an affair. Is she happy in her marriage? From an outsider's perspective, sure. But from a friend's perspective, when she calls me crying because her dumb@ss husband can't think with his big head, I have to wonder. She says she was always waiting for the shoe to drop. Even though he is her best friend, she, in the back of her mind, was waiting to be disappointed. Now, not getting into therapeutic issues that arise here, this really brings home the point: she may not have expected him to cheat, but she was certainly not surprised.
b) My second point: I think women are more likely to forgive an affair because and I know this is harsh, but let's call a spade a spade: we don't have high expections for our significant others. I.e. in general, we perceive them (men) to be stupid. Now don't get your panties all you married ladies in a twist. But think about it. Do you really, really think that your husbands, significant others etc. are really as smart as you emotionally? I know. I know. Big ole manhater comment. But heck, seriously, I think our society has gone way too far in accepting emotional mediocrity, behavioral mediocrity and mediorcrity in general. Nobody owns their own issues. It's always somebody else's fault. OOOOHHHHH this yanks my chain.
c) Of course, Married men may be the exception to the above-mentioned rule. But here is my take on that: married men are trained like monkeys. Like Pavlov's dog, married men have been trained to perform in a manner in accordance with their perceived reward: i.e. food, sex, power tools etc. The minute a wife get lax with training, the monkey reverts back to behavior only exhibited in the wild, i.e. sniffing randomn female butts.
Ok, now that was a manhater comment.
d) This is not to say they don't have their uses: changing the oil in the car, getting the cereal box from the top shelf, grunting at intruders. The obligatory procreation cycle. Just don't give them too much to think about. Seriously, I am not mad at all... Jack@sses.
Have a great day.
Amena's decidely unscientific take on the stock market.
It sucks.
But seriously, You all may be wondering why oh why, the market has lost 10+ percent, since Barack Obama's election.
Pondering this question, here are my thoughts.
A) Barack is perceived as pro-green, causing a humongous dumping of anything associated with fossil fuels. (This is actually true, not just conjecture).Course the green industry is not nearly big enough (IMO) to counterbalance massive sell-off.
B) The market trading floor is filled with greedy base-born, Republican stock trading Bastuhds.... Said greedy base-born dungheap Bastuhds have cranky pants on that McCain was not elected. Said Bastuds trading activity does not in anyway reflect economic activity, economic worries, issues etc of this country, and in fact reinforce the new 21st century reality of stock market movement: mooooh moooohh (weee there I go over the friggin cliff) mmmooooohhhh (oh crap, that was not supposed to be such a hard landing....splat). Collectively, the market equals one gigantic jack@ss.
C) Market movements is a normal market correction, i.e. normal sell-off after considerable market gains, and that once again the market and its movements have nothing to do with reality, and in fact simply likes round numbers. For example, market traders like bottoms and ceilings at whole numbers i.e. 9000, 9400 etc. 9000 may be a ceiling, or it may be a floor, depending on if we can break through it today. Again, no friggen correlation to reality.
D) Some combination of the above, seasoned by the fact that the market has this belief that Obama has magical powers to afffect market movement by simply breathing.
I really just wanted the opportunity to call Republicans base-born dung-hill Bastuhds. Have a great day!
But seriously, You all may be wondering why oh why, the market has lost 10+ percent, since Barack Obama's election.
Pondering this question, here are my thoughts.
A) Barack is perceived as pro-green, causing a humongous dumping of anything associated with fossil fuels. (This is actually true, not just conjecture).Course the green industry is not nearly big enough (IMO) to counterbalance massive sell-off.
B) The market trading floor is filled with greedy base-born, Republican stock trading Bastuhds.... Said greedy base-born dungheap Bastuhds have cranky pants on that McCain was not elected. Said Bastuds trading activity does not in anyway reflect economic activity, economic worries, issues etc of this country, and in fact reinforce the new 21st century reality of stock market movement: mooooh moooohh (weee there I go over the friggin cliff) mmmooooohhhh (oh crap, that was not supposed to be such a hard landing....splat). Collectively, the market equals one gigantic jack@ss.
C) Market movements is a normal market correction, i.e. normal sell-off after considerable market gains, and that once again the market and its movements have nothing to do with reality, and in fact simply likes round numbers. For example, market traders like bottoms and ceilings at whole numbers i.e. 9000, 9400 etc. 9000 may be a ceiling, or it may be a floor, depending on if we can break through it today. Again, no friggen correlation to reality.
D) Some combination of the above, seasoned by the fact that the market has this belief that Obama has magical powers to afffect market movement by simply breathing.
I really just wanted the opportunity to call Republicans base-born dung-hill Bastuhds. Have a great day!
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